Making Memories

My Last Day

I've been in NYC since last Tuesday to see one of my good friends perform at The Met. The production was lovely....and we went to every other opera and classical music event available to us. Today, I meet with my old boss from the Lyric who is now one of the producers at the NY Philharmonic....there is a possible job opportunity for this upcoming year. We'll see....fingers crossed. Other than that and eating from every food cart imaginable, I've not done too much (I fell down my stairs a few weeks ago and rolled my ankle, so sometimes walking proves to be a bit painful). Even with the small amount of exposure I've had, I'm in love with this place and never want to leave. I suppose I have to continue with my real life and work towards something greater, but the idea of just leaving everything behind is quite appealing right now.
I feel like I've learned so much about myself in a week, and have plans for the future that I couldn't quite see prior.
Well, I must go get ready. Hope you all are beautiful!

Pre-Op(era)

Was it yesterday or the day before? I can't quite remember because I've gone to The Met everyday for the past week.
Either way, we were waiting for The Tempest to begin...and this photo was quite possibly the best part of that two hour time span....
I generally like to find redeeming qualities in anything musical and otherwise, but the opera was HORRIBLE! The production looked stunning, but the music made me feel physically ill. We left during intermission (which I've never done).
Any way it goes though, we're in New York and experiencing what life has to offer two poor not-so-starving artists.
I hope you all are well. I'll check in again soon.
Bisous!

Subway Musicians

This is the first time I've seen subway musicians who were actually good....the song reminds me of my Grams.

Holiday...

I feel so grown up for the following reasons:
1) I bought stamps last week.
2) I mailed a thank you card three days ago - yes it was to my mother, but it still counts.
3) I payed off a debt (quite possibly again to my mum).
4) I'm in the market for a mattress....I'd like a Stearns and Foster Euro pillow top, but Lord knows Starbucks doesn't really pay enough for me to enjoy that unless I get it from the black market (if anybody has an uncle or something let me know).
And last, but certainly not least
5) I'm going on Holiday next week for the first time in my life! So excited....
I've never been to NYC, and the gay love of my life lives there now. Not only does he live there, but he's dancing in The Met's new production of Un Ballo in Maschera which is one of my favorite Verdian operas.
EEEEEK!

Foot in Mouth and Freaking Out

A gentleman caller I've been speaking with told me he started seeing someone....and I took my time to respond aside from "Well that's wonderful. Good Luck!" and thinking that they've already set the path to marriage or are somehow much more than he alluded to. He asks if what were/are (use your vivid imagination) is done. I said no and that I assumed that was the reason he was telling me....he replies "no" and something about honesty. Being the brilliant person I am, I asked if she cared. He said she doesn't really know (where's the truth in that?).
So I stew for a couple of days until last night, whilst a bit tipsy, I go into some rant via email on how I understand married people seeing a call girl but not beginning a relationship and keeping someone to fuck on the side. May have been super intense...definitely scared him off. (Not that I should care, but I'm so tired of being the other woman. It's exhausting! And I'm starting to feel like that's all I'm good for...like nothing I feel or think matters to another person - I guess that's kind of the point though...)
Two Points Me...I guess.

Fraud...

Somehow someone in California withdrew $503.00 from my account...dying! Smooth criminal for certain...because I've never lost my bank card, haven't been in California for twelve years, and have never given my pin to anyone.
Hmmm.

Dying Roses

I'm sitting at home. Alone. Looking at the flowers I bought for myself weeks ago that have since wilted but not lost any of their beauty...listening to Johnny Hartman and John Coltrane while smoking a cigarette (I do once or twice a year) and eating a doughnut (laughing). And I just thought to myself, "I'm that person."  The one in the horrendously boring but beautiful sequence at the beginning of many indie films. And I'm completely content with that. Smiles.
I hope that you all are doing wonderfully, and have much better stories to share than I do at present.
Cheers
ND

PS...this was the time I've segmented to attempt running. I don't think that's ever going to happen....

Making Peace

I used to hate myself. Couldn't stand the way I looked and struggled with how 'sinful' my thoughts were. I used to think I was completely past love and redemption. Which is kind of funny that those thoughts for me went hand in hand.
Very gradually, I've learned to accept who I am politically and as a woman who swears like a sailor and likes to...well fill in the blank. But it wasn't until very recently that I've become okay with the way I look.
I know it's probably entirely trivial to everyone else, but I had an aha moment today. I finally like me.
I no longer hate how large my posterior is...or how my lips take up 90% of my face...or my flat nose...or anything else for that matter (aside from how dry my skin is at times...making it necessary for me to have pedis more than the average person...who wants to curl up near an aligator?).
The way I came to this was entirely illegal - and I'm not ashamed...nor do I feel I have need to be! I have learned so much in this short period of time and have become a little less jaded about life that I feel it's entirely right for me at present.
Smiles

The Painted Lady

We, each of us, wear a mask
Concealing in some way our souls.
Some are more brilliant than others
With the blues and purples and golds...
We cannot be harmed should this face be put forth.
Sadly, however, it shows not our worth.
And, in the end, we're in further than planned in this life that is not really our own.